The topic for the 22nd day of my 30 day writing challenge is: Have you forgiven yourself for past personal failures? Why or why not?
The answer to the questions is yes. I usually do not allow myself to play the “it’s the worlds fault” game. If I make a decision I own it and I live with it. This is not to say that I do not hold other parties as responsible for their part of the situation, but it is never someone else’s fault. Holding myself responsibility allows me to do two things, 1) own my mistake and learn from it, 2) move past it. Most people point fingers and they keep doing it and this does not help them move passed the situation. They just have to hold on to it and keep telling themselves they are not to blame.
This is not to say that I do not have fears that have been birthed from these decision. I have a great deal of fear surrounding the idea of getting married again. I have fears of being homeless. I have fears of Noah having the same childhood I did. I try to keep these fears in check, and if I cannot do that alone I am 100% okay with getting some kind of help. I think I have a pretty good grasp on my past failures and use them to motivate me to be the best me.