Friday, February 12, 2016

5 Tips to a Healthy Long Distance Relationship

Long distance relationship in my view not any harder than normal relationships. With the exception of my sons father I have had a good run with them and it’s because I have stuck to some very simple rules.
single, mom, Healthy, tips, Long Distance,Relationship, dating

Watch what you say. 
When communicating over the internet, phone, or text to make up for the lack of face to face contact, nonverbal cues, and vocal cues it is easy to over share. People will say things in an email that they would think twice about in a face to face conversation. When sharing personal information always ask “would I share this if we were talking in person?”
Don’t jam pack your days together. 
One thing that sabotages long distance relationships is overly pack days together and too much romance. I know what you are thinking “how are these bad things?” The fact of the matter is if you date someone and every time you see each other you have nice dinners on the beach, go to museum, take long walks in the park, blah blah, you have built up this unrealistic idea of the person, the life you would leave together, and the relationships. Take the time to see each other as flawed, stressed, real humans and not this unrealistic romance. I am not saying don’t have fun but don’t make it a point everything you see one another.
Trail run before anyone moves. 
If you followed tip 2 this will be a simpler step. If the relationships is making a huge step into forever, DO NOT LEAVE YOUR LIFE. Take a two-week vacation and any other time you can and spend it with the other person living with them. Do this before you pick up your life.
Both make the time. 
Do not be the only person willing to travel. I do not care who does what work, this is a two-person commitment, and if only one person is working at it, it won’t work.
Don’t send nudes. 
I know a lot of people do not see this as a big deal. However, there are two problems with this. 1) What happens when you break up. More women need to think about this before sending pictures. 2) If you must send pictures and/or check state laws if a person wants to send the picture to others, post online, or sell in some states (or countries) it’s not illegal.

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Shakirah is a single mom to a 5 year old. She is a blogger, teacher, and graduate student. Her goal is to bring a more positive and realistic look into the lives of single mothers.


  1. Great tips! I'll def be pinning this!

  2. Totally agree with you on many points, especially the nude pictures and making the time. I have never been in a long distance relationship before, but I believe some of these rules do apply to all relationships. The nudes pictures are a big no no for me, revenge porn is real and also just the idea of doing it make me feel uncomfortable. In terms of making time, if only one person invests their time in the relationship then it may be a sign that things are not going as they should be (in my opinion). Great post

    1. Thank you for reading, and yeas if both are not making time it is not going to work.

  3. One of the biggest ruiner of trust in a relationship is lies and deception that leads to lies. No lasting love relationship can be attained where there is not truth. Josh clarkson